Journal

proof

A/N: I'm cycling through some anger and bitterness here again. If that doesn't sound like something you'd like to read, you can click away. You won't hurt my feelings. Today, I untethered myself from one of the last strong connections I had; my home parish. I pulled in last Sunday, thinking that maybe I actually… Continue reading proof

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Abuse, Culture

choice

Every choice, no matter what it is, has a consequence. Choosing hatred has consequences. Choosing love and forgiveness has consequences. So does, of course, that choice. Abortion is a topic that sits very deep in me. It's like an undersea volcano; there's both incredible agony and anger associated with this very controversial topic. It's also a… Continue reading choice

Journal

anniversaries

TW: This entry refers back to my suicide attempt last year as well as my past abuse. Autumn is only weeks away now, and thank God. After spring, autumn is my favorite season (with winter following very close after autumn, and summer in dead last due to the heat). The moment September started, I started… Continue reading anniversaries

Abuse, Recovery

re: trauma

If I were to sum up "trauma" in a word...I'd say "life-altering" is a pretty good one to use. It's something that causes great harm in whatever way the abuse entails, and maybe the worst harm is the harm done to the victim's perspective of reality. When I was growing up, I understood "trauma" from… Continue reading re: trauma

Abuse

what is abuse?

Abuse. Now, that's a loaded word. It's a word some like to ignore/laugh off to avoid facing the pain it carries, or conversely, play the alarmist with to emotionally (over)charge something. I can understand; there's only so much darkness I can take in one sitting, though I do want this matter to be given the care and… Continue reading what is abuse?

Recovery

identity

I always had a strange relationship with my reflection. Ever since I was a very little girl, I'd have this existential crisis whenever I'd see my reflection: "Who is that in the mirror? Is she me? She can't be; if she is, then who am I?" My parents didn't understand. They decided to interpret it… Continue reading identity